your room smells of hookers.
And success
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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