I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
