hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize