Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I had to cum in my sink.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
