I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
