Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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