my vag is so smooth its legendary
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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