Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
