Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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