we should wear snuggies to the strip club
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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