As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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