there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize