That's intense
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize