you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Fuck appropriateness.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
