:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
