if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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