Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
and she was petting her beer can
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
