I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
