Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
