If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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