im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
my sisters under your porch take her home
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Randomize
