You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize