Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
