I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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