I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
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