what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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