am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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