I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
