i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
