got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
if i died would you start the facebook group?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Randomize
