Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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