it wasn't lemon gatorade
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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