found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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