Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
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