she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
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