I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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