im having a threesome with these popsicles
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
