Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
