is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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