We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
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