You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
