sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
