Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
