I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize