I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
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