I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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