Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
