I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
