Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
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