He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
So much Jack, so little girl.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
